Friday, August 27
Morning
Yesterday couldn't have been a better first day of school. No tears. No trepidation. Happy at the end of the day. A plan for next year -- schedule a Back to School Breakfast with the Moms. I was so antsy yesterday I couldn't write a thing and showed up 20 minutes early to pick them up.
These first days the kids get off at 1:00 and I wanted to avoid heavy afternoon naps, so we went to swim at the Y, then for a celebratory ice cream cone at Lion's Choice (29 cents for a dip cone -- best deal around) and then to the library. See pic at left of the boys on our bed enjoying their largesse. The library makes me feel so rich and satisfies any shopping need I might have.
This morning was smooth, too and we actually needed sweatshirts. Is this pic a promotion for SFB or what?
If you haven't already please do me a favor and vote for our kids' school at Kohl's Cares. It's a chance for the school to receive $500,000. Voting is easy and you can vote five times. Pass the word, okay? Just click here: VOTE FOR THE SHORTAL GRANDS' SCHOOL!
Wednesday, August 25 - Happy Birthday, Nicky!
Morning
Today Nicky is five. And he seems to be a healthy, happy, normal five-year-old boy -- God help us! Pictured here with his favorite b'day gift -- a little steam engine from Miss Judy.
Some news: Last spring we got the news that Mommy is expecting another baby. I didn't write about it then because I wanted to wait until we had told the kids and because it took me a while to process this news -- as you can imagine. We know he's a boy and he looks healthy so far. He's due right around Christmas. Mommy has chosen the name Gabriel Jesse Byrne Shortal -- a nice name for a Christmas boy child.
How do I feel about it? Sakura said it well when I told her. I feel both "happy and lonely." I asked her to explain and she said, "Well, Nana, happy because ... It's a baby!" and with that she threw our her arms as if to embrace every child ever born. "And lonely because I won't get to see him."
I assured her that she would get to see him, but just not soon. Her first question actually was, "Will he be part of the Shortal family?" (At the time we didn't know if he would be given Shortal as a last name, but apparently that's the plan.) Sakura and I discussed different ways of being in a family. I reminded her that I don't live with my brother or sister, but love them very much. And there is Aunt Kathy and her cousins whose names are not Shortal, but they're part of the family.
I can't wish away a child. I can wish for better circumstances, better-equipped parents, but to wish away a child ... that's just not part of my makeup. So little Gabriel Jesse, we will welcome you in whatever way is appropriate and possible. And I very much hope that Mommy (and Daddy) and Mommy's sister and brother-in-law, with whom she is living in Texas, can provide what this little guy needs and deserves.
Last day of summer vacation today. Plan is to go to Lost Valley for a swim and picnic lunch. Then the whole backpack, school lunch, school clothes, early bed (hah!) routine starts. Onward!
Tuesday, August 24
Morning
Nick's last day of four. We were going to Lost Valley Lake today, but decided to make it a home day and go tomorrow to celebrate his birthday. The kids are playing peaceably (more or less), Pat's got garden chores and a porch repair project and I'm just doing my usual ... restoring order.
Got to thinking about the dangers of wearing new clothing before washing and decided to wash all the kids' school shirts and shorts today. I know -- a bit over the top, but who knows what chemicals are on those clothes and they have baby skin.
Oh, please do me a favor and vote for our kids' school at Kohl's Cares. It's a chance for the school to receive $500,000. Voting is easy and you can vote five times. Pass the word, okay? Just click here: VOTE FOR THE SHORTAL GRANDS' SCHOOL!
Monday, August 23
Morning
Yesterday was Daddy's 28th birthday. My first child. Amazing. Wednesday, Nick will be 5.
We went to church in the morning -- first choir Mass of the season -- then to breakfast to wait  until our school's open house began at 12:00.  We met each teacher and delivered all supplies. Unfortunately, we couldn't get the school pics done. Lines were just too long and we'd already been in Washington since 8:30. There's a make-up day.
Came home for naps and then welcomed nine for dinner. Fr. S, our pastor, joined us, as did Nick's Godmother, Ann, and the family. Later Friend John came by to pick tomatoes and joined us for dessert. A good family gathering for the end of summer -- with good summer food -- potato salad, fresh tomatoes, green beans -- and of course, Ann's delicious chocolate cake. Good to have a Godmother who is such a great baker.
No real plans for today. Pat has to go to work in St. Louis. I'm thinking YMCA, swimming, lunch in the park. Great to have a few easy days with the kids before school starts on Thursday.
Pics are the kids, each with their teachers. They all look pleased now. I'm praying for a good school year. Amen!

Late Afternoon
Spent the morning at the Y. The kids love the nursery and were there almost an hour while I worked out -- stationary bike, elliptical, and rowing machine -- only ten minutes each -- it's all I can manage right now. Then the kids and I went to the Y pool, followed by the park playground for lunch and an hour of play. I packed their food in their school lunch bags and we had a "rehearsal lunch." Needed it, too. We'll do it a couple more times before school so the little guys get the hang of it.
Got home about 2:00 and had two hours of read and rest. A good day. Time to clean up the picnic detritus, gather the wet stuff off the line, think about supper.


Saturday, August 21
Morning After Exciting Night
Tornado warnings last night about 9:00. Three friends called to tell us to get to the basement. We had just put the kids down so we got them up, gathered quilts, flashlights, radio, and cell phone and spent 45 minutes or so in the basement. It was scary so we said our prayers and sang a bit.
Quite the storm, but no damage. Three-and-a-half inches of rain! We needed the rain, but ... yowzer! After we came upstairs, there was still too much lightning and thunder for the kids to go to sleep so we let them get up again. I made popcorn and we watched an episode of LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE. By 11:30 we were all pretty sleepy and went to bed. A memory maker.
As we were in the basement, I thought about how precious our home is to us. How precious these little ones we've given our lives to. It's all passing, just not too fast, Lord, okay?
A no-agenda Saturday ahead. We'll do some preparations for tomorrow's birthday dinner -- Daddy will be 28 tomorrow and Nick will be 5 on Wednesday. Doesn't seem all that long ago that Daddy was 5.

Evening
It was a perfect day -- one that I don't want to end. I didn't leave the house, except for a few walk-arounds outside, emptying the compost bowl, hanging out quilts to air. Just made it a day to restore order to my surrounds and it felt so good.
After a long Read&Rest, Sakura wanted to bake a "cookie pie," so we made chocolate chip cookie bars. The pics show just how happy she is. I wish I had a soundtrack -- always humming, singing, laughing, chattering away.
As I write they are all three outside on the trampoline and playing in the sprinkler -- like bright, happy birds. Pat is mowing the lawn, I've finished with all kitchen chores. O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!” she chortled in her joy. These days are all the more precious because they are rare, especially as the school year begins this week. But, they don't have to be as rare as they are. Making a decision to just stay home, not turn on the TV, not make phone calls ... leads to a sense of abundant time ... and peace.
Tomorrow is church, followed by lunch and errands with the kids and then school pictures, open house to meet their teachers, delivering school supplies to their classrooms.  It's a smart thing to do all this on the Sunday before school begins. The first day is actually Thursday. Hope we can figure out how to get up, dress, eat and get in the car an hour before we're used to waking -- all without succumbing to temper tantrums by noon.
Time to gather tomorrow's church clothes, school picture clothes, and all that we'll need for tomorrow AM. Then in the evening we have nine here for supper to celebrate with the birthday boys.
Pics -- Sakura cooking and sharing cookie dough with Nick. Move over Julia Child, or with that smile, Julia Roberts? Pic below is staged, but cute, eh? Matt was just waking from his nap and Sakura wanted me to think they were all asleep.
Friday, August 20
Morning
It's only 9:30, but it feels like "late morning," as I awoke at 5:00, refreshed from a full night's sleep. We spent yesterday at Lost Valley Lake, playing in the sand and water. We took Sakura's friend, Olivia, and Friend Kathy and her son, Sam, joined us. These last days before school starts are just delicious. And boy do we all sleep well!
One less pleasant experience that happens too often is the conflict that ensues when it's time to go. I've tried the "ten minutes more" approach, complete with countdown. I've tried talking it through before we go somewhere, too. Still, we seem to not to be able to end a pleasant day without me calling out repeatedly that it's time to go, eventually raising my voice, as they pout or cry or drag their feet in protest. It's frustrating, especially after such a lovely day. Any advice?
But mostly it was great fun. Water and sand and sun, a picnic lunch -- the best of summer. (Sorry no pics -- took my camera, but just too busy living it to record it. Next time.)

Evening
A good, satisfying day. Got home at naptime. Took Matt to the library with me this aft while the Bigs just wanted to stay home. At suppertime the kids were playing outside with the sprinkler and trampoline, having such a great time that we didn't want to call them in, so Pat and I ate before them while playing Scrabble. When they came in they were soaked. I put them in their towels and they stood on the porch looking in the kitchen window at Pa making faces at them. As you can see, they found him hilarious.
I've been thinking more about that issue of repeating myself so often with the kids. Got to thinking that maybe it's like directing the choir. I often stop directing during the Mass because there are pieces they can sing perfectly well without me and they get less weary of my direction. (And you thought it was because my arms were tired!) Maybe it's the same with the kids -- I natter on about a lot. I'll have to add another to my two mantras which are, "When possible say, 'Yes.'" and "Somebody IS watching." The third will be, "Stop nattering."
It occurs to me that the other reason I stop directing the choir at certain times is so that so much of their experience of the Mass isn't funneled through me. That's true with kids, too. I find myself so often pointing out things to look at as we drive or otherwise interpreting their experience for them. It's wearying -- to them and to me.
They ate their supper and now they're watching Peter Pan -- the old Disney version. The music of those old Disney movies is marvelous.
That reminds me, yesterday at the beach, Nick said, "Nana, you know that music we listen to in the car -- isn't it beautiful?" My sensitive guy. I bought a set of six CDs of children's songs, produced by Disney. They know so many songs now. Matt's latest favorite is "Shoo Fly" and Nick's is "Grandfather Clock."
Monday, August 16
Suppertime AKA The Arsenic Hour
A very relaxing day of catching up. Weather turned lovely last night and we were able to open up the house (except between 2 and 4 AM when a skunk prowled around our bedroom window - whew!).
Yesterday after Mass Pat and I led our choir -- 51 folks in all -- on a St. Louis tour that included brunch at the Bevo Mill, the Vatican Splendors Exhibit at the History Museum, supper/snack at Ted Drewes (frozen custard), and a short visit to the downtown City Gardens. A full, but satisfying day.
Today I've been working in my study, catching up on bills, paperwork, trying to jettison a bunch of stuff so I can dedicate the week to necessary writing and a last week of summer fun before school starts.  Pat worked in the garden. His harvest is more obvious than mine. He processed 18 quarts of tomatoes and has enough left over to make chili sauce. Such bounty.
The kids have just been hanging -- playing together all day, naps in the afternoon.
One problem that is going to be serious come school time: they won't go to bed for anyone else. Matt just will NOT go to sleep. Sakura and Nick don't cooperate and get to bed late. I'm afraid I've got them in such a routine that they won't go to bed for anyone but me. Even Pat has more trouble than I do. What to do?
Tomorrow is a writing day while the kids go to St. Louis and have fun with Daddy and Grandpa Bob. If I'm really, really good and get my quota written, I'm going to the movies with Carol -- EAT, PRAY, LOVE. Looking forward to it.

Wednesday, August 11
Early Afternoon
Writing from a Bread Company in the Soulard area of St. Louis after meeting with old Jesuit friend and kinda-sorta Spiritual Director. We didn't get to much nitty-gritty today -- chitchat about liturgy, catching up. As always, I ran into other Jesuits I've known a while, this time including one who is my contemporary -- as opposed to doddering. I hope to see more of him in future months. Apparently he's in some kind of distress and in St. Louis for an airing out.
While waiting in the lobby I read the College Church bulletin. They are in the midst of their 175th anniversary year and there is apparently a DVD history of the College Church. I'm not sure I want to see it. Is nineteen years worth a mention? Probably not. I wasn't the pastor, after all. It's sobering though. I have to ask what else I could have been doing during those nineteen years? Should I have more to show for them? If I had been doing something else, would I be more likely to make the celebratory DVD? I raised three sons while working at SFX and I wonder if their lives would be easier now if I had devoted myself to them more. Maybe so, maybe not. Or if I worked at a job that paid better perhaps they could have had an easier time going to college.
Hindsight -- or in this case, hindblindness -- isn't worth much unless ... UNLESS! ... it informs the future. Now I'm raising three more children and working as a freelancer -- choir director, writer. I find myself caring less about matters that once occupied me -- liturgical shoddiness, pastoral insensitivity --  matters that ultimately I could not affect. That must be good. I just hope I have found and can maintain the right balance so that these three Littles get what they need from me -- no less, but not too much either.
Since Sunday: Monday was spent going through their clothes -- a twice-a-year task that feels like more work than it is; haircuts all around; dinner with friends John and Carol. As John and Pat talked and the kids played, I told Carol - a bit tearfully, I'm afraid - that they are the only people who don't seem to hesitate asking all five of us over. I know that hesitation and understand it. But I am so very grateful that they love these children so much. We're all kind of awed by the nature of our friendship, by the Power that brought us together. Timing baby, timing.
Tuesday I wrote all day and Pat had the kids. They seemed to have a good day.
Today they are with Grandpa Bob and Daddy while Pat works and I hang in St. Louis. Tonight Pat and I will have dinner alone together.
Tomorrow AM I'll take the kids to Lost Valley and meet up with Aunt Kathy and her eldest son Michael and his fiancee Wei. Wei is Chinese and a child therapist specializing in trauma victims. She was wonderful with our kids when she meet them several months ago.
Must get to writing the stuff I get paid to write. More later -- with photos, I promise!
Sunday, August 8
Evening
Today was church and the fair. The Washington Missouri Town and Country Fair, for those not from these parts. Thanks to friends Rich and Kathy, we scored two passes and only had to pay admission for Sakura. Expensive otherwise. Good fun. Matt a little young for it and he did have a meltdown.
Okay, is it wrong to threaten a little screaming child with the police? He started it! That is, as I am hustling through a crowd with him throwing himself this way and that in my arms, bellowing all the while, he noticed a police car. I said, "Yes, that's where we're going. The police have to be told about little boys who are screaming at the fair." Whoa baby - it worked. He settled down, let me rest him for a bit, cool him off, give him a drink and we rejoined Pat and the Bigs. And every time he saw security after that, he got very sober. Damaged for life? Probably not.
A few photos: Matt playing in wheat in Agriland; Sakura pretending to be fat -- she's filled her shirt with soybeans; Nick in a car; and below - all three in a teacup. A great day.
Saturday, August 7
Morning
All slept in until 8:00. Well, all except Early Bird Pat. He likes to get up early and meander around the garden saying his prayers.
Yesterday was a calm, peaceful day. All three saw eye doctor, Suzanne Kindle - a lovely, calming woman. Sakura just fell in love with her and announced that she wanted to be an eye doctor and suggested a partnership. Dr. K. immediately invited her to help with Matt's exam with which Matt was cooperative!
From there to drop off outgrown clothes at Encore, then to the park for two hours of picnic and playground time. Made our way to Michaels where we found the last of the school supplies -- Crayola Modeling Clay and art smocks for the guys. And finally the grocery store where, after a perfect day, Sakura had a near meltdown because she couldn't ride in the car-cart -- a little cart with room for two toddlers to "drive." I couldn't believe it. She suggested that I loved them more than her and on and on and ON! Finally, I just told her to get over it and then suggested that the car cart was really a pickup truck and she could ride on the hood. All mended. Jeeeesh!
Came home to make a good supper of shrimp, sweet corn, salad with fresh tomatoes, and cheese bread while the kids watched a Tom & Jerry cartoon DVD and laughed their heads off. Lovely thing about that T&J - no dialogue; just music and sound effects. Maybe not good if kids are parked in front of the TV for hours, but during the Arsenic Hour before supper ... well, it's better than becoming a slow, steady drinker, yes?
Today is "don't get into a vehicle" Saturday, but we may break that tradition and take the kids swimming this aft. Meanwhile, I must attack -- okay better -- make peace with -- my study! It's a wreck and I'm so behind on ordinary paperwork -- because I can't find it! Onward!
Oh, I did find the old camera so here are a few pics: Matt with Dr. Kindle; kids at the park; riding in the grocery store "pickup truck;" and below, snuggling with Pa before bed. A good day.
Sunday, August 1
Noon
Summer is flying by. August already. School starts August 26, but there are several school-related meetings before then. Yesterday I made a list for August -- the writing projects that are due, the house projects that are needed, and all the fun things I hope we can still fit in -- sort of a summer "Bucket List." One of those was to go to Mass at College Church this morning, but Sakura is puny. She started with a low-grade fever and the weeps yesterday about suppertime and she's still under the weather. Pat had to drive the truck in to St. Louis with a bunch of Phil's stuff already loaded so we changed plans at the last minute and he took the boys, leaving me at home with Sakura. They also will visit Pat's mom who was admitted to the hospital last night. She was attacked by a swarm of bees last week and there seems to be complications from the meds.
So ... not what any of us planned, but it's okay. Certainly my duty is sweet -- staying home with the most biddable of my children whose only need is chicken noodle soup and a care bear to cuddle. Bless her heart! I let her watch library videos to distract her from her weepiness. Not sure what is making her so sad -- if it's anything beyond being sick. Phil was moving a lot of his stuff from the apartment he had been staying in and it might have upset her to see all those things from their old home. She's usually pretty sober after an encounter with either of her parents.
She watched Dumbo this morning -- an old favorite she used to watch with Aunt Bessie. There is one scene when all the mother animals are cuddling their young and I wondered what's in her mind. I think she very often identifies with the mother and she's very maternal toward the boys who respond in kind. They turn to her as often as they turn to me for comfort, although Matt has always been affectionate and Nick is more and more. He's a happy camper these days.
Looks like she's falling asleep. I do hope this just lasts a couple of days. We have plans on Tuesday to visit a water park and Thursday to go to the Washington Town and Country Fair.
Tuesday, June 27
Almost Suppertime
It's hard to stay faithful to this effort when there is little to report. Of course, life with kids is always changing, but there is also a comfortable mundanity about it all.  Like right now -- they're playing Hide 'n' Seek. So cool that they're all old enough for such games. Last night they were missing winter so they went up to find their robes -- see pic at left.
Our daily M-F routine is to take the kids to the YMCA for camp. Sakura goes 8-3 and the boys 9-12 so I do a bit of waiting around. I've been participating in a water exercise class that is so fun it feels like playing. Met a woman in class who is a graphic artist and teaches digital technology for artists. Cool woman. I also work out a couple times a week on the machines which is a lot more like work.
I have several writing assignments pending -- my monthly WOW column for Liguorian and my Daily Bread commentary and prayers for Celebration; an article on juggling family and ministry work during Holy Week for Ministry and Liturgy; and a Lent booklet due September 10. (A small gulp.) I'll get it done.
Time to get supper -- spaghetti, cucumber salad, watermelon. Friends are coming over to pick blackberries and their youngest guy does DS stuff with Sakura. I don't get any of it, but she can't wait to visit with him. Then it's baths, pack the lunches and backpacks, make sure the swimsuits are all dry, maybe a load of laundry ... or two ... and bed. It's a good life.

Evening
Supper finished, Pat's out on the tractor, Sakura in the bath, boys' turn next. Friends came over to pick blackberries, but not soon enough for Nick and Sakura. Pic at left is of them watching the timer -- for 30-plus minutes! Then Sakura told Nick that he should continue to watch the timer while she and Matt watched for them out the window. Thank goodness they came early.
Should also mention that Matt coined a new term. He whines a lot these days and I tend to tune him out. Finally I realized he had just finished a big dump on the potty and the toilet paper roll was empty. He was asking most urgently for "pee-pee paper."

Saturday, July 17
Afternoon
It's a perfect stay-at-home, no-car day. Our schedule these days is much like the school year -- driving into Washington Sunday through Friday. We decided we'd work it out so that Saturday we don't have to leave home. With that in mind, I've decided not to sign up the kids for sports or other events that require Saturday attendance. We need one day at home together without an agenda.
I was up at 5:30 this morning and picked blackberries and peaches in the garden, along with a couple of green tomatoes. Then I made pizza dough for tonight's dinner and tried baking some garlic to make a kind of garlic and olive oil spread for pizza or bread. Pat worked in the garden until it got too hot. The kids slept in a bit, then played outside, jumping on the trampoline, doing chalk art on the sidewalk, and digging in the shade beneath the cabin porch. Lunch, Scrabble, naps and now Sakura is practicing cursive writing in a new work book I got her. Recently a friend asked her what very special thing would happen in second grade. She replied, "cursive writing." (I think her answer was supposed to be Holy Communion, but what can you do?) Nick is learning to print in a similar workbook with Sakura kibitzing. He handles a pencil very well, but she just might turn him off for life. She loves the idea of being the teacher a little too much.
I've been reading Anne Lamott's trilogy of novesl that begins with Rosie, then Crooked Little Heart, and ends with Imperfect Birds. I'm only a few pages into the third one and Rosie is now 17. I just can't bear to think of Sakura doing drugs, drinking, having sex with ... anyone! Until she's mature, I mean. How do I raise her to avoid the pitfalls of this culture? She is so beautiful. I want to steal her away to ... an ashram in India? a sailboat in the middle of the ocean? an island? It makes me mad that there isn't more help from our church and schools, although I'm not sure what that help would look like. A clear alternative, I suppose.
People think raising these little ones is hard. I can do this. But I can't bear to think about them as teenagers. In six years Sakura will be 13 and I will be 63. Holy Moly!
(Sorry about no pics. Attempts to download have failed. Will try again Monday when the techies are awake.)

Sunday, July 18
Morning
This morning the photo download works. Will add more after church. Meanwhile, here is Sakura's latest creation -- a chalk drawing that reminds me of chalk art of little girls in India. Notice the stones and the single flower. Love it. 




































Afternoon
Church was exciting -- an impressive storm and lightning hit the steeple. Felt my hair stand on end. Fire alarm shrilling, tower bells clanging, emergency vehicles, fire fighters on walkie talkies -- wooeee! But, all is well -- I think. May have blown out our speakers. With no speakers, I had to quickly substitute another song. Chose HOW GREAT THOU ART -- seemed appropriate.
After grocery shopping, a quick drive-by egg-drop to Miss Judy and Miss Eunice and home for lunch, Sakura and I went to a play at East Central College. SOMETHING'S AFOOT, a musical based on Agatha Christi's TEN LITTLE INDIANS. Very, very well done -- funny, well-sung, impressive. Sakura loved it.
A few pics: Yesterday's garden bounty of blackberries, peaches and a few green tomatoes; garlic and onions hanging on the cabin porch; Nick and Matt digging beneath the cabin porch; Sakura wearing her glasses. Last night we watched episodes of the old TV show, FLIPPER -- which all three watched attentively -- and Sakura discovered she could see better wearing her glasses. And below: the three kids before Mass this morning.  The dress is from India -- last summer Sakura will be able to wear it, but she plans to save it "In case Nicky or Matthew have a little girl." Hmmm.














































Leaving town Tuesday for Chicago -- one day to drive there and a three-day job leading worship for a liturigcal conference sponsored by Celebration. I'm going to miss the kids. Oddly enough, I'm not looking forward to being away from them.

Evening
A sharp memory from the month I spent in the Guatemalan children's home when I adopted our first: There were 14 infants and I don't know how many toddlers there and the woman who ran the place suffered a sudden back problem. I went down early to help. Talk about trial by fire! I learned a lot about the basics and after you've changed a diaper with worms -- whoa baby!!! -- any other diaper seems easy.
Anyway the memory was of two phrases I learned in Spanish that I used over and over and OVER again: ¿Dónde están tus zapatos? and Cerrar la puerta!!! That is: Where are your shoes? and Close the door!!! I wonder if I taught it to our kids in Spanish if it would have more effect. Hmmm.
Friday, July 16
Late Morning
I'm writing from the Y -- a place I've come to appreciate. The atmosphere is upbeat and friendly, the kids love it and I am grateful for the opportunity to exercise. I'm starting slow -- a water aerobics class three mornings a week, some work in the fitness center several days a week, and beginning in two weeks, a spin (cycling) class, which will kill me before it makes me stronger. I'm feeling better -- more energetic and hopeful about future energy. I want to attend better to my eating habits, too. I just woke up one day and realized that losing 30 pounds would do more to change my life for the better than anything else I can think of and it's do-able so why not?! And our Y has WiFi - hmmm, maybe they should call it
Y-Fi.
The kids are good. It's  been a challenging week with Pat working three days in St. Louis and getting home after bedtimes each night. Next week he and I have a job in Chicago with friends, Lucy and Dave. It's for a conference sponsored by one of the journals I write for -- Celebration. We'll provide music and worship leadership for the three-day conference. Should be fun and good to have some adult time. Thank God (many times!) for friends Carol and John who will watch the kids while we're gone. The kids are so comfortable with them.
Three pics -- thanks to Daddy and Grandpa Bob who took them to the Magic House. We try to take the kids in to visit Daddy every couple of weeks.

Saturday, July 10 - Happy Birthday, Matthew!

















Matt is three today! He's pretty civilized for three. Most pee and poop ends up in the proper vessel. Mostly he sleeps in his bed. Mostly asks for what he wants (instead of crying, whining, yelling, stomping, etc.). Mostly plays well with others. Now that I think about it, that's not bad for any age.
The woman who invented room-darkening curtains is a SAINT! The kids and I slept until 8:45. I awoke to Sakura and Nick singing "Happy Birthday" to Matt. Pat was already out, over to his office (only a block away) to get some papers he needs for the week and then re-appeared here with coffee for Nana. Whoa baby. We picked up croissants last night so our breakfast was really good pastry, fresh melon and good coffee or milk. We travel with our own goat milk, believe it or not.
Time to start this day. It's City Garden until we go home. It's been a nice vacation.
Sunday, July 11
Got home yesterday about 5:00 after a perfect day. Pics from City Garden at Left: Sakura w/ a tired Matthew; Nick exploring; Sakura mugging; and below -- the three of them posing for Daddy., who took all these pics, by the way.

















We had a little birthday "breakfast supper" for Matt last night and stuck three used birthday candles into a plate of waffles and sang. He was as pleased as punch.
There are two moments I'd like to catch -- the first time a person enjoys another person's birthday and the first time a person is thrilled to be told to take a nap. Four and seven are not those ages, although Sakura handles her brothers' birthdays pretty well by "helping" them. Nick tries, but it's hard to watch his brother get the coolest truck ever! Poor guy. Anyway, we made it through the first b'days without Mary and Mommy. Worked out okay.

Late Afternoon
A quiet, rainy, uneventful Sunday. Choir Mass at 9:00, for which we were early!!! Stopped off after at good friends, Judy and Eunice, who are loving Aunty-like women to the kids. They had presents for Matthew and little stuff for the Bigs. Home for lunch, Scrabble with Pat, nap with Matt, and kitchen and laundry work.
Feeling a little overwhelmed at the thought of the next couple of weeks -- job in Chicago next week, writing this week, getting the kids to and from Y-camp. Just need to take it one day at a time, I know, but sometimes the realization that I -- wait, that's WE -- me AND Pat -- are in this for the long haul, is just overwhelming. We're the wrong age for this, not only because of the obvious energy issues, but our friends don't have little kids. And ours are the only small ones in our family, too, so inviting us to a meal or family gathering is quite a commitment.
And yet ... as I write, Sakura and Pa (as they now call him) are chatting in the kitchen about garden truck he is putting up and the boys are in the living room playing quite sweetly with a combination of trucks, train cars and an upside down bucket which is, I'm told, "a big tower." Go figure.
Life is good. Must finish folding the laundry and figuring out camp lunches for this week.
Thursday, July 8 -- Goodbye 57!
Last day of 57. Yikes!
We're off to St. Louis to spend two nights in a $49 room at the downtown Hyatt with plans to visit parks, the City Garden - a water park right downtown - eat a bit, play a lot. My birthday is tomorrow and Matt's on Saturday so we decided to celebrate a little differently. Seems important to find new ways to do things since Mary's passing and with Mommy gone. Besides we planned this summer to include our big vacation at the beginning, this mid-summer mini-vacation in St. Louis, and in August we'll spend a couple nights at Lost Valley Lake Resort where we have a membership.  Must get to packing! More later.
Tuesday, July 6 -- Happy Birthday, Mom!
Noon
I'm writing from the Y where the kids are in Day Camps for the month of July. It's a great opportunity for me to try  classes and work out. Today I did a water aerobics class and  beginning spin (cycling).  The first was so much fun I felt like a kid and couldn't stop smiling. The women were fun to talk with, too. The spinning is wayyyyy more challenging, but I think it will be good. I have to do classes that are low impact on a bum ankle. I am so out of shape. Since the Grands moved in on September 1 -- just over ten months ago! -- I haven't followed that wisdom of taking care of myself first . And it shows. And I feel it. And I really, really don't like it.
So ... my new part-time job is working out. I'm sort of pretending I'm in training for something -- like the rest of my life?
While I have time, a few more pics from our beach vacation. Doesn't the one below look like an ad for summer fun?



















The rest of the pics to the left: The kids before sleep. They loved sleeping in the same big bed every night on vacation -- so much so that they are still sharing a room since we got home. Motel "picnic breakfast." Matt taking a beach nap. Nick stylin'. And below, Sakura - a natural on her boogie board.






















A very privileged vacation time together. I'm so grateful.
Paige Byrne Shortal
GranDiary Summer 2010
My seasonal record of sharing life
with our three grandchildren.
Click HERE to begin or see other GranDiary pages.
Saturday, July 3
We're baaaccckkk!
The Sunburned Gang + Corpus Christi, TX
Happy Independence Day!
Monday, July 5
Evening
Thank you to all who said you missed me. That's encouraging and very sweet. I missed writing this, too, and I hate that I missed all of June. It was such a lovely, full month. Maybe I was too busy living it to write about it. But when I don't write about my day, time just slides on by. Somehow writing each night slows down time just a bit.
A quick recap: School was finished the last week of May and we packed the van and drove to Corpus Christi, Texas -- about 2200 miles round trip. We took three days coming and going, stopping in motels with pools. The Grands were outstanding travellers. Everyone told me to have videos ready, but we ignored that advice. Sakura and Nick took the back of the van and read through hours of books on tape, sang along with CDs and, while Sakura played with her new DS (it's a handheld game that I finally decided was not from the devil), Nick peacefully looked out the window.
Matt was in the second seat and demanded a bit more entertaining, but he wasn't bad. And ... wait for it ... he toilet-trained himself during the drive. I don't know if he just figured out that we would stop if he yelled, "I got to go peee-ah. I have to pooooo-pah." I think Matt has some Italian in him somewhere - he always adds an extra vowel. Anyway, stop we did and he always did the business he promised to do. So Hallelujah! Not only can he start pre-school in August, he's also enrolled in YMCA camps this month. And ... we're down to one diaper a day per boy -- just at night. Although Nick announced tonight, as I was putting him to bed, that he would stop wearing diapers even at night(!) on his fifth birthday.
Corpus was my mom and her husband, Jerry; my sis Lisa and her husband, Mike;'and the BEACH! Oh it was grand.
I'll post a couple of pics here now and fill you in a bit more in the next few posts. Fam photo from left: my sister, Lisa, my mom, Nick, Sakura, Lisa's husband Mike, me, Pat holding Matt. Next is Nick, Matt and Pat mugging at What-a-Burger -- the Big Deal chain in Texas. And Matt in my mom's garden, looking at the fish in her pond. Like the haircut?
Friday, July 9 - Hello 58!
Beginning a new year. Voice message from my mom. Nice notes from folks. Hugs from kids. Coffee, doughnut, and fresh melon from Pat. Oh yes.
Awoke at the Hyatt in downtown St. Louis. Pics at left -- lonnngggg haul -- er, I mean hall -- to our rooms. Look carefully and you can see little people running at the far end. But ... the view is worth it. Kids love looking out at the trucks and helicopters and boats on the Mississippi river traffic.
After unpacking and a brief rest in our hotel room, we went out for the evening -- first to the downtown library -- a lovely building. The kids could sit there all night. Then to the farmers' market where we bought the doughnuts and melon for breakfast. Then on to a neighborhood called The Hill, an old Italian neighborhood where we used to live (no, we're not Italian) and home to some of the finest restaurants in town. We ate at Mama Campisi's, an old favorite of ours. Sakura announced that it was the best pizza she had ever eaten.
From there we went to City Garden -- a two block complex of fountains and lights that the kids just love. We changed them into their swim suits and let them run in the water before we came back to the hotel. No pics -- just too dark.
Now must get this day started. We'll meet Grandpa Bob, Daddy and Uncle Nate at a Mangia Italiano's for a birthday lunch and then we'll see what's possible with rainy weather. Always something fun to do -- especially with Pat leadng the tribe. I'm so grateful for him.
Onward.

Evening
While Pat took the kids on a trolley bus ride downtown, I visited Left Bank Books. Forty minutes of bookstore time is  a great b'day present. We went to Mangia's for a great lunch buffet -- cheaper than fast food and really good gazpacho, stuffed mushrooms, homemade pastas, salads, pita w/hummus -- amazing. My kind of food. From there we visited Tower Grove Park where the kids waded in the fountain. See pics below. Came back to the hotel about 3:30 for R&R (Read and Rest) and now we're heading out for an ice cream supper at a parlor called The Fountains. I've heard it's great. We'll visit a playground during the evening and then back here one more night. It's really very relaxing. Daddy is a big help as he enjoys playing with them so I spend some time reading or just gazing about. Works for all of us!
Tuesday, July 13
Early Morning
It's just 5:00 in the morning and I've been up for a half hour or so. This was once my usual waking hour and I love being up before everyone, drinking good coffee, writing.
Yesterday was not my favorite day. Juggling the camp schedule is tough. Sakura's day is 8:00 to 3:00. The boys 9:00 to 12:00. There's not quite enough time to get home to do anything meaningful so I find myself "killing time" -- a hateful phrase -- in Washington. Not too hard for a writer, but yesterday I got a call -- Matt was having a meltdown and could I please come get him? By the time I arrived, he was cool again so I pulled out my laptop in the Y foyer.
The hard part is knowing what to do from 12:00 to 3:00 with two tired boys. Too hot and humid for the park. Too short a time to get home, nap, and get back -- although I may have to rethink that. I missed Mary and her little Washington apartment so much that I had to fight back tears. And I found myself furious with their parents. Both gone, no local family support left. It's just hard.
Sakura doesn't get to swim on Mondays and Matt was begging to swim so I promised them a half-hour in the Y pool. That worked out okay, although do try to picture me in a dressing room with all three of them. Nick can dress himself, but demands help. Matt needs help, but has an "I can do it" attitude -- which is great ... sometimes. And eager Sakura is announcing that "the clock doesn't start until we get in the pool ... right Nana?!"
Anyway, we got home a little after 4:00 with groceries to get in, storm coming, hungry, crabby. Got a quick supper of salad with grilled chicken and cheese bread, fed the animals, took a walk in the garden and noticed that Matt had dirtied his pants. It was when I had my hands covered in loose poop and Sakura asked for ice cream that I lost it. Yelled at them all. Came out of the bathroom and Sakura was parked in a corner, weeping. She said between sobs that when I yelled like that it reminded her of Olive Street where Mommy yelled all the time. Oh great, just what I want to hear.
We all calmed down, had ice cream, Matt asleep by 7:30, the Bigs in bed by 8:30 after reading THE RUNAWAY BUNNY, a too young book for them, but a favorite. Sakura promised they would never run away from me, but she was wakeful because of lightning ... and maybe Nana Beast? It was 9:30 before I finished kitchen chores, folding laundry, packing backpacks, and getting lunches ready.
But I slept well. And Pat is home today to help with the driving. And friend Carol is coming home after two weeks away and she loves the kids like another Grandma. And working out at the Y is helping ... I think. It will be okay. Right?

Evening
A MUCH better day. I brought the boys home after camp and they rested. Then Pat took Nick to recycle and to pick up Sakura, giving me some quiet time while Matt napped. I love it when it works. AND ... Carol is home! She and John came to supper tonight and she will bring Sakura home tomorrow -- God love her! -- so I can bring the boys home to nap. Yes!
A few more pics from the birthday weekend: Nick, then Sakura, as Pa amused them while we waited for food. They were trying not to blink. Pa with Nick and Matt and his new truck from Great Grandma Ouida (my mom); Matt playing with his favorite gift -- I LOVE those dimpled hands; Sakura washing carrots while Pa cut them up to process.
And this evening after garden supper of home-grown potatoes, carrots, cucumber salad and blackberry crisp (oh baby!), Sakura decided to dance. She took out the CD player and found some lovely music and just looked so lovely and happy. Life really is very good!

Sunday, July 25
Morning
Home again! Actually we got home Saturday evening from Chicago where Pat and I, along with friends, Lucy and Dave, were leading worhsip for a conference sponsored by the National Catholic Reporter. I write Sunday intercessory prayers and commentary on the daily readings for NCR's liturgical magazine, Celebration, and this was a gathering of liturgists. Good folks. Good work. Glad to be home.
The kids were fine with our friends, John and Carol who also seemed fine after the experience. Carol claims that being with the kids keeps them from getting "moldy." God love 'em! They are the family we rely on most for help with the kids -- them and the fantastic babysitters we've found in the girls, Noel and Marie - sisters and absolutely lovely with our kids. I'd be happy to see Sakura grow up to be like to those girls: smart, good conversationalists, musicians, happy with themselves.
We got home just in time to harvest the corn and Pat processed two buckets -- translates to 12 quarts off the cob -- while I processed buckets of laundry! Jeesh! Also picked and froze a gallon of blackberries. We took the kids to the Union pool at 4:00. It's half price for the last two hours AND we don't have to initiate getting them out of the pool. Much easier when the lifeguard says it's closing time. And at that hour we don't have to slather them with sunblock.
All three kids were cuddly yesterday and glad to be back to routine, I think. As were we. Pictures today, I promise. Just have to unearth my camera. Now I have to figure out our church arrangements today. The choir is off for three weeks and we thought we'd visit other churches, but ... old habits die hard and we miss our SFB friends. We'll see -- it's still early and all are sleeping, even Pat.

Afternoon
Absolution! I was making chocolate chip cookies and decided to make a few M&M cookies as well. Sakura and Nick came to the kitchen to scarf and I gave them each a few M&Ms. I asked Nick, "Do you remember when I used to give you three M&Ms when you pooped in the potty?" He smiled and said, "Yes, I do." And I said, "And sometimes I got mad when you pooped in your pants, remember that?" He said, "Yes." And I said, "I'm really sorry about that. I was wrong to get so mad." And he said, "It was your only fault." I'm not kidding. I was so shocked I asked him to repeat it: "It was your only fault." I mean now THAT -- along with the understanding smile and remember he is only four years old! -- is absolution!

Evening
A pic of the kids in the tank -- with a small pool as their "boat." Notice in the background the corn is as high as ... well MY eye anyway. Delicious, too.
Thursday, August 5
Morning
Okay, let's catch up.
Monday was taking Sakura to the doctor -- ear infection. No swimming until Thursday. Temps were 100+  so avoiding the water was a real penance. I took the boys with us to the doc so Pat could spend his time painting the tin roof of the porch and demolishing the porch ceiling. HOT! He's amazing.
After Walgreens for Sakura prescription -- antibiotic and ear drops -- we came home for lunch and the kids crashed. One summer practice has been lovely -- the afternoon Read and Rest. Matt in our bed, Nick on the "little couch," Sakura in her bed, Pat and I on couch or floor. No one has to sleep, but silence is mandatory. (Most of us sleep!)
Tuesday I took the kids on morning errands while Pat finished painting -- hottest day of the summer. I had promised each child a choice of toy at Walmart at the end of all errands -- not a bribe exactly, but the use of money for something we returned. As we were in line to make the return, Matt pitched a fit and I said simply that we had to leave. Clearly, Sakura thought I was bluffing, but when we started driving home she said, "I just can't believe we're doing this!" I pointed out that she had participated in Matt's fit a little bit as she was teasing. To my surprise, she agreed and didn't sulk.
Yesterday Pat went to work in St. Louis and then went to see his mom and take her to dinner. (Sobered because they could both order off the 55+ menu - hah!) I had the kids all the hot, hot day, but we did fine together. We visited friends John and Carol, delivered milk to Aunt Florence, and then tried the Walmart school supplies and toy outing. My actions the day before at Walmart served me well. The Bigs avoided teasing Matt and worked to hush him if he even hinted at a whine. We ended the afternoon with a 2:00 "Dunch" -- dinner / lunch -- at Bejing Chinese restaurant (kids eat free!) where they were as good as gold. I was proud of them. Oh and they spent the afternoon with their new toys -- Sakura a DS game and the boys with Hotwheels. I love to hear their roll-play as they work out their games. I think Nick is often a police officer or other person of authority.
And I found my camera. My study is a no-woman's-land of school supplies, school clothes, out-grown clothes to recycle to Encore (cool name for our parish resale shop, isn't it?), and my own projects. It's hard to find time in there as I have to close the door (AC) and I can't hear the kids. And when they rest, I do, too. It will be better when school starts.
Anyway, today I will take some pics and post them this evening. Plan is to use coupons to go to a water park with our three and three teenagers -- Noel and Marie who babysit and Sean, who is Miss Carol's nephew. Pat will stay home and replace the bathroom ceiling fixture. So it's me, three teens and three Littles. Prayers!

Friday, August 6 -- Feast of the Transfiguration
Morning
As my Indian friends would say, "an auspicious day." Great word - auspicious.
The reason for this auspiciousness (hmmm, not such a great word in noun form), is this feast day of light and potential. It is the day we remember the disciples receiving a sort of pre-figuring of the resurrected Jesus. There they were, up on that mountain, groggy from lack of sleep, awaking from a doze and finding Jesus, bright with light and chatting up Moses and Elijah. Hmmm. I think that it was not Jesus who was changed, but that the eyes of the disciples were opened for just a moment to see Jesus as he really was, bright and filled with light as he walked around dusty Palestine. And so we might pray to have our eyes open today to see others as they really are.
Mary's stroke was on the Second Sunday of Lent, the other day of the year when we hear this same Gospel of Transfiguration. I've been reading SLOW LOVE by who defines such love as "knowing what we have before it's gone." I certainly feel that way about Mary. Although we were good friends and I knew she would most likely die before me, losing her has opened my eyes to what a friend she was. Whoa ... I miss her so much. Tears.
I'm sorry there are no pictures. I took my new camera to the water park and when I attempted to take a pic, the camera would not open properly. Checked with Amazon and I am three days past the window to return the camera. Natch. Not sure what my options are now. It's a Kodak. Any advice?
Yesterday was almost magical. I took the three kids and three teens to the water park and we had a blast. The teens were so attentive to the littles, just lovely. We spent five hours at the park and then went to Chilis for dinner. I had a couple of gift cards and we used 'em up. Those kids all ate like ... well, like kids who have been in the water for five hours. Matt and Nick put away huge plates of mac 'n' cheese. Sakura ate an entire pizza by herself along with a side of broccoli that was at least two servings. And no one got sunburned. Just good fun.
This morning the kids appear to be sleeping in. Then we go to the eye doc to check out all three of them. Sakura is wearing her glasses more and I suspect needs a new scrip and Nick may be a bit nearsighted, too. Planning on a swim at the Y after the eye doc.
I'll resolve the camera thing soon ... I hope. Missed some great photo ops yesterday, darn it!

A Little Later
Kids still sleeping at 8:15! Thank you for room darkening shades!
I forgot to mention in my discussion of this auspicious day, that it is also the 65th anniversary of the bombing of Hiroshima. Such a contrast -- the bright light of Jesus and that bright light of destruction. Both leave their mark. Only one is lasting.
Friday, August 13 - Happy 27th Mommy
Afternoon
At least I think it's Friday. If it weren't for Sakura's Days of the Week underpants, I wouldn't have a clue. I do love summer.
Yesterday we took the kids to Lost Valley to picnic and swim in the lake with Aunt Kathy (Pat's sister) and her oldest son Michael who is town with his fiancee Wei. Lovely girl. Lovely couple. So happy for them and for Kathy. It means a lot when a mom's children are well-matched and these two seem perfect for each other.
Pics to the left are of Michael, Wei and Sakura doing a Double Chicken. Below is one of Pat with Matt and me in the background with Nick. Just a perfect day.
Michael, by the way, is a computer geek and a good one. He explained to me why folks were having trouble loading my pictures and told me what to do. Having done it, I hope it's easier now for you to view.
This morning Pat took the kids on errands while I wrote feverishly against a deadline. Made it, too, and with time to do a bit more organizing in my study. After lunch and the boys were bedded down for naps, I took Sakura to get her new glasses -- seriously cute and I promise a photo soon -- and then to the home of Miss Judy and Miss Eunice who have planned some girl time just with Sakura -- a movie and dinner. S was seriously pumped and prepared presents for both of them.
Today is Mommy's birthday and we called this morning and had a nice long talk. Nicest chat I've had with her in months and the kids had good phone time with her, too. She was upbeat and that helps the kids a lot. It's hard for them to think of Mommy as sad so when she's up, they really enjoy talking with her and don't feel sad when the conversation is over.
I have errands to attend to before I go home, so best get along. Later.
Saturday, August 14
Morning
Parish picture day - 10:00 AM appointment to have our family picture taken for the parish directory. Sprucing up and trying to keep us fresh until then. Carrying our shirts in the car and changing there. We were promised that below the waist wouldn't show. I'm holding them to that.

Evening
Picture taking a success -- too much so. We bought a package! It included the CD of all the pics so we can make our copies for Christmas Cards, etc. But ... I feel a little stupid. Kind of a lot of pressure to make up your mind fast with folks waiting in the hallway. I could call and cancel our order, I suppose, but we're justifying the cost by figuring on using them for Christmas presents. Try to look surprised ... and delighted!
Thursday, August 26 - First Day of School!!!
Morning
Well, we made it! This is the first year Sakura has made the first day of school at SFBGS. She was sick the last two years. They were all excited. No tears. Nick feeling like a pretty big kid. Matthew charged right in Matthew-style. Sakura already issuing instructions -- "No running in the halls! It's a rule!"
It was a good summer. I was thinking last night that I have no regrets. We had lots of pool time, park time, hanging out time. Summer movies. A vacation to Texas; an overnight in St. Louis; time at Lost Valley Lake. The one thing we didn't do was time on the river and this Sunday Sakura and I will go on a mother/daughter float trip with the girls in her class.
I suppose I should end this Summer GranDiary and begin Autumn, but I think I'll wait until after Labor Day. Now it's time for me to start a Lenten book due to the editors by the middle of September.
Note to self: "School" is not the best word for photographs. "Cheese" is better.
BTW, if you haven't already please do me a favor and vote for our kids' school at Kohl's Cares. It's a chance for the school to receive $500,000. Voting is easy and you can vote five times. Pass the word, okay? Just click here: VOTE FOR THE SHORTAL GRANDS' SCHOOL!
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